An authoritative guide to best practice in helping children and families with attachment difficulties.

This is an exciting text which provides professionals with examples of attachment theory in practice. I like how you can dip into each chapter whilst there is still a running theme if you read from start to finish. This is a very realistic text which also remains academic and informative, using different disciplines to show how we can understand attachment behaviour, whilst still being very relevant to the social worker and the profession. The practical examples give the reader a real sense of how they could apply their learning from reading this to the children and families they are working with. This book touched me personally and I think that people will be able to relate to the examples in this book on both a personal and professional level. -- Nicola Hope, Team Coordinator, Children & Families Services, Staffordshire County Council It is rare, indeed a privilege to read a book on attachment in which the rawness and immediacy of caring for and working with children...comes across so powerfully. The authors of each chapter speak directly of their own experience - as birth parents, adoptive parents, foster carers, teachers, therapists, social workers, children. Their honesty and candour, hurt and love burn through every page. I Know it Hurts and I Know it's Scary gives us a rare glimpse of attachment in action and relationships in practice, through thick and thin. I hope that when you have read the following fourteen chapters, each one as brave as it is personal, you will feel as uplifted as I did when I first had the pleasure of reading this exceptional volume. -- From the foreword by David Howe Haven't we always known that relationships are at the heart of the human experience? But what happens when the primal attachment doesn't happen as it should? Before we are rational beings, we are sensual beings. Trauma happens at the sensual, emotional level and thus doesn't lend itself to reflection and rational responses. This book recognizes and addresses this in an easy to understand manner. This work is amazing in that, not only has it included the emotional, neurobiological, psychological, and social developmental wounds inherent in attachment deficits, but it has done an exceptional job of demonstrating this understanding in a variety of different scenarios. This makes the book a treasure for anyone who works with children: parents, teachers, physicians, psychologists, social workers, lawyers and the "adult children" themselves who want to understand their reactions to their own childhood experiences. There are so many exciting things to say about this book, it would take another book to list them all. I would just say that if I were to recommend any book on the subject of how attachment affects children as well as excellent suggestions for healing, this is the book. -- Nancy Verrier, MFT Author of The Primal Wound and Coming Home to Self

Caroline Archer is an adoptive parent, an independent consultant in post-adoption support and a therapeutic parent mentor. She is also the bestselling author of Reparenting the Child who Hurts: A Guide to Healing Developmental Trauma and Attachment, First Steps in Parenting a Child who Hurts: Tiddlers and Toddlers 2nd Edition, Next Steps in Parenting a Child who Hurts: Tykes and Teens (with Christine Gordon), New Families, Old Scripts: A Guide to the Language of Trauma and Attachment in Adoptive Families (with Christine Gordon) and Trauma, Attachment and Family Permanence: Fear Can Stop You Loving (edited with Alan Burnell). She is a keen supporter of regional and national rugby teams in Wales and loves following road and track cycling. Charlotte Drury is the Chair of the Attachment Network Wales. Throughout her career Charlotte has had a passionate commitment to children's rights and improving outcomes for children and families and sees awareness and understanding of attachment throughout the life course as fundamental to this. Prior to undertaking a PhD Scholarship at Cardiff University she worked with Children and Young People's Partnerships and has also worked in social work, safeguarding and equalities. Jude Hills has recently completed an MSc in Play Therapy at the University of South Wales. She has had many years of experience working directly with children in post-adoption support, as a foster carer and provides training for foster carers and social workers. She has four adopted and two birth children. Jude is particularly interested in attachment and therapeutic life story work.

Foreword. David Howe, University of East Anglia. Introduction. Caroline Archer, independent consultant and therapeutic parent mentor, Charlotte Drury, Chair of Attachment Network Wales and Jude Hills. Part 1 Introductory Narrative: Hurt, Humour and Persistence. 1. 'Jolly Walking': How Social workers Can Support Poorly Attached Children and Their Caregivers Effectively . Victoria Drury, social worker. Part 2. Educational Narratives: Understanding, Nurturing and Transitions. 2. The Message Behind the Behaviour: Understanding Attachment in the Classroom. Emma Birch, PhD student, University of Edinburgh. 3. Nurturing the Educational Environment: Creating Safe Space for Children to Learn. Ann Cartwright, teacher and author. 4. 'No,no,no, Mummy. I Don't Want to go to Nursery!': Traumatic Transitions from Home to School. Marie Martin. Part 3. Therapeutic Narratives: Moving, Mentoring, Partnerships and Patience. 5. 'Not Again Little Owl': Transitions from Foster Care to Adoption . Viv Norris, Consultant Clinical Psychologist, Certified Theraplay(R) Therapist and Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy (DDP) Practitioner. 6. Developmental Trauma and Attachment: An Integrative Therapeutic Approach . Lisa Waycott, Clinical Director of Stepping Stones (Child Therapy Consultants) Ltd and Senior Lecturer, University of South Wales, Claire Carbiss, Play Therapist, Stepping Stones (Child Therapy Consultants) Ltd and Karen McInness, University of South Wales and Stepping Stones (Child Therapy Consultants) Ltd. 7. 'Smile Though Your Heart is Breaking': Therapeutic Parent Mentoring for 'Good Kids' and Their Families. Caroline Archer, independent consultant and therapeutic parent mentor. 8. Getting the Right FIT: The Team as a Secure Base for Supporting Families - Helen O'Shea, Aneurin Bevan University Health Board and Elaine Simpson, Action for Children. 9. 'Slowly Undoing': A Case Study from a Residential Setting. Jonny Matthew, Youth Justice Board and Tricia Skuse, Wales Forensic Adolescent Consultation and Treatment (FACT). Part 4. Legal Narrative: Assessments and Court Reports. 10. Beyond Feeding and Watering: Trauma and Attachment-based Court Assessments. Christine Gordon, Family Futures Consortium. Part 5. Personal Narratives: Pain, Persistence and Growth. 11. Through Prison Walls: Strengthening Adult Attachments from the Outside In. Hannah Fryer. 12. Mending Hearts: The Lasting Effects of Early Surgical Trauma. Jane McNamara, counsellor, play therapist and writer. 13. Holding on and Letting Go: Bereavement and the Bonds of Attachment, An Adoptee's Perspective. Tamara Gordon, producer and director. Part 6. Closing Narrative: Expression and Exploration. 14. 'And If You Have No Words for It?': An Exploration of Attachment Issues Through Art Therapy . Helen Jury, Art Psychotherapist, Course Leader MA Art Psychotherapy, University South Wales. Index. Glossary. References.