Author(s): Amity Pierce Buxton
Candid, compassionate, authoritative this invaluable book incorporates the author's seven years of research and interviews with hundreds of spouses with insights derived from her own teaching and counseling work. It offers a rich source of insights, information, and practical guidance.
Contains stories and tactics for straight spouses and their families to constructively cope with a mate or family member who declares his/her homosexuality. Analyzes six key issues a straight spouse faces when a partner comes out' including damaged sexuality, threatened marital relationships, conflicting spouse/parent roles, devalued self-concept, destroyed integrity and shattered belief systems.
In over two million marriages, one spouse is gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Having a spouse or parent disclose his or her same-sex attraction is a shattering experience fraught with pain, confusion, anger, and a profound loss of self-esteem. Amity Pierce Buxton spotlights this exploding phenomenon and reports constructive coping strategies that spouses and children have used to resolve problems of sexual damage, family breakdown, deception, and homophobia.
Illustrated throughout by riveting personal narratives, this expanded edition of The Other Side of the Closet traces the family's journey from initial trauma to eventual transformation. This invaluable source of information for spouses, families, and professionals is based on Dr. Buxton's eight years of research, including interviews with 1,000 straight spouses and children, her own personal experience, and her counseling work with spouses of gay, lesbian, and bisexual partners.
"The first major work on the topic." --Gay Community News
"A much needed comprehensive study of what happens to husbands, wives, and children during the coming-out crisis.".--The Reverend Jane E. Vennard, founder Task Force for Spouses of Gays and Lesbians
Partial table of contents:; SEXUAL MISMATCH: DAMAGED SEXUALITY OF THE STRAIGHT SPOUSE.; Healing Sexual Damage.; TRIAL AND ERROR: CHALLENGE TO TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE STYLES.; Personal Stories.; GROWING PAINS: CONFLICTING ROLES AS PARENT AND SPOUSE.; Balancing Children's and Parents' Issues.; WHAT ABOUT ME?: IDENTITY CRISIS OF THE STRAIGHT SPOUSE.; Discovering the Authentic Self.; POWER OF THE LIE: THE SHATTERING OF INTEGRITY.; Reversing the Negative Effects of Deception.; FAMILY VOICES: AFTERSHOCKS IN THE CHILDREN'S WORLD.; Widening the Scope of Concern.; BREAKING THE MOLD: TRANSFORMATION OF SHATTERED BELIEF SYSTEM.; Creating a New Belief System.; BEYOND THE CLOSET.; Appendices.; Endnotes.